This move across the country all by myself has been one of the best things that has ever happened to me. It’s right up there with EFY. SUU. My loving parents. Brother. Aunts. Uncles. Cousins. FRIENDS who have come and gone from my life. A good laugh. Ice cream and chocolate. A good song with a catchy tune, a good beat and a lyric that describes my simply complicated life. I feel so blessed.
If you had told me I would move to middle of nowhere Pennsylvania on my own for a nonpaying internship five years ago, I would have thought you were crazy. I would have thought you were crazy two years ago, one year ago, six months ago, for different reasons. This was not part of my plan but it was a part of the Lords plan. And it is beautiful.
This distance has been clarifying. I have had no one to turn to but to the Lord. My prayers have taken on deeper meaning, my scripture study brings answers I didn’t even know I was looking for. I have more time to ponder, more time in my own thoughts.
I live simply, wake prepare for the day, go to my internship, soak in my environment and every experience and word of advice that is offered, come home, work on homework, get ready for bed, sleep, and repeat it all the next day. There is a beauty in the simplicity. I’m taking better care of myself than I ever have, eating healthy, exercising a little everyday, sleeping 8+ hours a day. And I feel better. I have more energy and I like myself more. I’m cleaning up after myself more and am relishing in the peace of a clean home. I listen to uplifting music at home.
I am learning who I am on my own. I’m learning what I want out of life.
I’m comparing myself to everyone I know less. I’m realizing that I am a beginner. I am a beginner at my job. I’m a beginner at being an adult. I’m a beginner at love. And it’s ok to be a beginner. Everyone has to start out as a beginner.